Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.
Christmas Reflection and Traditions…
It’s that time of year again…you know, when everybody gets together for a day or two as a family to thrive in joyous gift-exchanging splendor. All the children are well behaved. Nobody thinks about the money they spend. The old family dynamics stay buried. The turkey is perfectly golden. Yes, it’s a wonderful life…somewhere.
my father and mother in Christmas past...i miss you
the cousins at Christmas circa 1983
In my world the children are racing around the house all fighting over one toy. The cat is climbing the tree knocking glass ornaments asunder. Dad is telling the same stories over and over and over. Mother hurt my feelings. I burnt the pie. Yes…it is indeed a wonderful life…right here, right now. It’s not perfect, but it’s happiness on steroids.
Memories of Christmas long ago make me smile. All the chaos, all the love. This year I will be alone. We are all blessed in different ways….
Christmas when the twins were 2 and I had a kidney stone!!!
Many of us celebrate Christmas alone. This may be the first time for us, an odd set of circumstances this year or an every year thing. Some of us are single living along. Some of us are widows or widowers and some of us are separated or divorced. Some of us are in nursing homes. Some of us are in a distant land on business. Quite a few of us have family living elsewhere. It may be that our health or finances or the weather prevents us from being with loved ones this Christmas. Perhaps we are able to celebrate with a faith community on Christmas eve or Christmas morning.
my children with Santa
For us who are alone, Christmas can be a great blessing. A gift of time and solitude to be with ourselves in joyful measure.
There is no ideal Christmas; only the one Christmas you decide to make as a reflection of your values, desires, affections, traditions. -Bill McKibben
This quote really touched something deep in me. I hate to admit it, but 2010 has been a very tough year and, at times, I have been feeling down, disconnected, and not my joyful self. I do not like to whine too much, because I have a beautiful and full life…so when I contemplated the above quote, I realized that it is exactly what I believe and bring that makes a holiday joyful…not feeling sorry for myself…
California dreaming Christmas 2008 with Chip
St. Francis Preaching to the Birds - Giotto
So what am I going to do about my feelings of sadness…what I always do when I am too focused on self…turn outward and think of others…is there a neighbor who lives alone I can visit? can i make a contribution to a food bank?
Your Local Food Bank Needs You
Many this year find themselves among the growing number of “nontraditional” food pantry clients across the country. 1 in 6 Americans struggle with hunger today. They include more formerly independent senior citizens, more people who own houses and more people who used to call themselves “middle-class” — those who are not used to fretting over the price of milk.
“We’re getting calls all the time from people who want to know how to get here,” said Kristine Gibson, community outreach manager at the Stockton food pantry. “And when I ask where they live, they give an address of a nice neighborhood, one where you or I would want to live.”
This holiday season, consider the possibility of making your dinner a food drive; you can ask your guests to bring canned goods, in lieu of house gifts…Have a neighborhood food drive with your children – make a flyer and pass around this weekend and pick up on Monday and deliver to the food bank…
To find the nearest food bank to you, check out The Food Bank locator from Feeding America.
New Traditions
I will repeat my being with the birds tradition a la St. Francis of Assisi which I began in 2007. St. Francis loved animals because they, too, were God’s creatures. He extended special kindness to animals at Christmas. He urged farmers to provide their oxen and donkeys with extra rations of corn and hay “for the reverence of the Son of God, whom on such a night the Blessed Virgin did lay down in the stall between the ox and the donkey.” At Christmastide, St. Francis scattered crumbs of bread under the trees, so the tiny creatures could feast and be happy. I don’t have oxen or donkeys to celebrate with, but I can scatter bird seed around my tiny island on Christmas eve so that the birds, too, can celebrate…
Saint Francis' birds are fed on Christmas Eve 2007 - a new tradition launched
Read about other Christmas traditions here.
sir chancelot with my tree 2010
my children with Santa
Rebecca, God is speaking through you. I have tears in my eyes- thank you for your honesty, thank you for looking outward, thank you for sharing all of your beautiful, chaotic “happiness on steroids” memories- and, oh, can I so relate to it all!!