This is my summer to rest, recreate and reimagine with discernment. My ReImagine ME Summer embraces the subtle shifts that are happening in my life: my spiritual practice, my role in the workplace, my creative work, the use of my physical space, my ministry, my health. All are in flow at the moment…all are being reframed and reformed during My ReImagine ME Summer! It is my time to ReBecca!
A Flight of Fancy
I seem to have lost my spark, or tucked it away over the past couple of years. A master teacher entered my life to teach me just how strong I am. This life lesson came with a price – the me that I am was slowly vanishing under weighty verbal abuse…some call it bullying. How could a woman of my age fall victim to this? Trust me, it can happen to anyone at any age.
Thankfully, that teacher has moved on, which means I am free to imagine again or anew; to form a new conception of ME. “This requires a shift in viewpoint, an openness to new information, a willingness to be inspired, and a desire to grow.” according to Vinita Hampton Wright in her inspirational blog Days of Deepening Friendship.
ReImagine ME Summer – or Time to Regain ReBecca
I am working on regaining my spark while I Reimagine Me! I am determined to ReBecca. I had to look deep within to find the happy, cheerful, positive person I had hidden away. I have been truly hiding my light under a bushel to survive. I am a ‘live in the now’ person. I don’t look back at things I can’t change or look too far into a future that may not happen. I stay and play in the moment, because this is the glorious time God has gifted me. He also gave me homework this summer. I am working on:
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a shift in viewpoint
This needs the most attention from me. Bullying is lies someone tells you about yourself. If done well enough and long enough, you begin to believe them. Shifting my viewpoint from a negative self-perspective to positive mindset is taking longer than I had hoped. I am embracing my truth by digging deep into the person I am. I actually stepped into this shifting process in February when I wrote my Work-Life Balance Manifesto. Thoughts of unworthiness are a bully’s hypnosis. Escaping that is like an awakening…a slow opening…
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an openness to new information
I am opening up carefully. I am reframing the negative feedback of the past into factual, more accurate information. Opening up is welcoming new information to flow into you. It is also a willingness to be vulnerable again. However, the new strength I have is the ability to say, “No! Stop! This is not right!” I have learned to set boundaries to what behavior I will accept into my life space. I am open and willing…
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a willingness to be inspired
I am innately curious and always willing to be inspired. ‘Always’ was my bullies buzzword. She did not like ‘always’ for some reason. My bully used ‘superior’ influence to intimidate me and wipe away my creativeness and inspiration to innovate. I just stopped and withdrew. I am allowing myself to be inspired, to use my voice again and to grow…
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a desire to grow
I love to find growing edges within me. I embrace growth and the growing pains associated with it. I know there is an infinite space to grow and a lifetime to grow. I kept learning during this period. It was and is my saving grace coupled with prayer.
A Boost of ReImagining
In her blog post Vinita asks, “Can you remember a time when you did some reimagining that gave a boost to your life?” Oh Yes, I am smack in the midst of reclaiming the new and wiser ReBecca. I am enjoying every second. I can look back on the bullies hypnosis and free myself from its absurdity. I say with conviction that no one is unworthy. The light that flows through the universe, flows through me.
I am learning to accept myself without complaint. I refuse to engage is sabotaging acts of self-contempt. I refuse to use or accept the use of inaccurate adjectives to describe me. I am reimagining the self-image that I carry in my mind and my spirit. I recently asked friends on Facebook to give three words to describe me as a branding exercise. The top three words were: creative, funny, and kind, with spiritual a close forth. I embrace these with a smile as I release the past and reimagine ME.
Molly Freibott says
This struck me so deeply. You put beautifully into words your struggle and your truth. I feel like saying I am in the same place is such a cliche understatement. I am waking up to realize I have been hiding in most of the areas of my life because of fear, abuse from outside influence and just to be safe. The situation has changed and the people I needed to keep safe can stand up and defend themselves. But an I? You beautifully stated that you were opening up to new ideas but retaining the power to say “no this is wrong”….profound. Sending you love And prayers!